*Pure

You never know when inspiration is giong to come. Music is my nspiration. As I was sitting in my Den I was watching TV and I happend to sear singing and drums. DRUMS. A real drum set, not a drum machine or a track, but cymbals and a snare drum.

I quickly grabbed my keys and went outside and found my way to the music. Excited my the live instruments, and the voices that I heard had tears flowing from my eyes. These young kids playing music without all the technical terms and conctant critique that I have learned while at Berklee. I just felt good.

In three's

The last week and a half has sucked something horrible. It started with my mother having 2 seizure's, my co-worker/friends (#1) grandmother dieing, my other co-worker(#2) getting in a car accident and having a stroke at 24 years old. All this followed by co-worker (#1) Aunt going in the hospital on oxygen, my mom's friend(and mines) dieing of a heart-attack. I went to my mom's friend funeral this past Thursday. Just when I thought I was in the clear and last night my best male friend's mother died.

There was only 3 days in between he funeral and another death.

My heart is broken.

I asked my friends mom to adopt me when my mother dies of Brain Cancer. I just can't believe this life. They say death comes in three's ... but why did she have to be the third. Why does there have to be a third?

My heart needs a vacation.





I'm trying to accept everything but I can't just yet. I've been up all night weighing the value of life that exsist in our hearts and the value of life in our minds. Im trying to understand at what calculation does life hurt and when does life feel good. When will my zeal for life return?